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Please help fund "Howard's Brain"
"Was there ever a time when you thought you were OK but there was something wrong with other people"?
Hi P,
All the time. I constantly think I'm right and others are wrong. Even when I'm proved wrong and know I'm wrong, I still don't understand why I'm wrong, even though I'm aware I'm wrong.
There have been many incidents where I know I'm 100% right. All of a sudden the person I'm with is so hurt and so in shock that I said what I said or could be thinking they way I'm thinking. I know I'm wrong, but have absolutely no idea why I'm wrong. I go to other friends or people and tell them what happened. I then get that sad look and grimace and I know I'm off.
I've accepted the fact that I have FTD, my brain is damaged and my thought process is corrupt. I can only try to minimize the effect I have on others. These days I've been forcing myself to slow down and be quieter when I'm in a serious conversation . I've been somewhat successful (I think). I'm still the incessant talking, no-stop chattering FTD'er most of the time, but I'm working on identifying those moments when I hurt people and screw up. I'm trying to minimize the damage I do to other people.
Anyone that knows me, knows that I'm incredibly logical. It's just my judgement, reasoning and common sense that's all screwed up.
Living life this way is a nightmare. The movie, "Howard's Brain" shows how operating with a damaged brain can turn a normal situation to absolute chaos for me and those around me.
I can only hope people keep donating so we can show the insidious face of FTD and work toward's getting a cure.
Every day FTD poses new challenges. I can only hope to minimize the pain to others and somehow keep my sanity, while I slowly losing my mind.
Howard
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