Dr. Jekyll and Mr. FTD

Was just standing and filming on the main drag (187th) yesterday when I was approached by a familiar face. He asked if I was "lost," I smiled, laughed and told him no. It's the street I'm known to wander and hang around. It took me a little while to remember Emile's name, but I've see him around on and off for decades and he knew my situation. Emile is someone I rarely see but know I can trust. That's something I've here in this neighborhood of New York. I was born and raised here and back and forth all my life. There's something about walking around a NYC neighborhood and not being able to walk 100 feet without nodding to a familiar face you've known forever, even if you don't know there name. You know them as kids, then adults with there own children and finally now some of them are becoming grandparents. 

I'll miss this neighborhood when I move. You build a whole relationship with the neighborhood. People envision NYC as totally cold and hard, but it's not. One of my docs, whose a good friend has threatened in the past to come to my apt door and drag me to her office if I don't make an appt. She still writes and calls for me to come in and never charges me. This is the real NYC that no one knows unless they live it. 

Since I've Goodyear Blimped out with my body, I decided to fast for a day or two. This way I would shrink my stomach and then start consuming smaller, healthier meals like salads. Hey, worked great. Fasted for a day and a half, then had a small salad for lunch. Last night uncontrollable carb cravings came on hard for Pizza/Pasta etc.. I drank about 5 glasses of water to help squash the hunger. Didn't work and about 10pm the Pizza delivery guy was knocking at my door with a Large pie. Hey, my stomach must've shrunk because I only ate 3 of the 6 slices. Normally I devour the whole thing. That of course led me to my smoke detector going off this morning. Got hungry this morning so threw the pizza slices in the oven. Forgot about it since I usually don't eat in the morning. While in the shower the smoke detector went off making enough noise to wake the dead. I use my smoke detector as a timer. When it goes off I know my food is ready. I was careful getting out of the shower. I usually run to the kitchen when the smoke detector goes off. I keep it on the kitchen table so it's easy to get to and disable.  Lost my balance a couple of days ago and feel out of the shower/bath. Since I don't wear a "Help, I've Fallen and Can't Get Up" pendents, I got out slowly before sprinting to the kitchen. I used to wear one of those Medic Alert bracelets but it interfered with sex, so I removed it. 

Not easy being alone with FTD. Maybe I should move to Utah and convert to Mormonism. Mormons like Jews. We're both outcasts. I've known many Mormons in my life and they are some of the finest people I've met and great partners/caregivers. A couple of wives would suit me well. Especially with this FTD teenage libido thing going. Hey, any Mormons reading this don't take offense. It's just me and I'm me. Maybe I'll come home from the AFTD conference in Salt Lake City with some wives or just stay in Utah. Need to do something in life where I've just a little help so I can devote time to some real FTD advocacy. Even with half a brain I know I can accomplish much given the opportunity.

As you can tell, it's afternoon and I'm losing it. I never write after mornings or do anything. Sort of a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. FTD thing. I start getting tired and awareness and self control disappear. I'm real fun to hang out with. Never know what I'll say or do. People around me are usually hysterical laughing or chasing me down the street wanting to kill me.

At Cafe Buunni drinking simple brewed coffee. Hopefully I won't get kicked out for staring at every butt that walks by. Just realized and became aware that I've been doing that for a while. Hey, at least there are nice butts walking by. No free refills here, so no 2nd cup. Outa here soon.

*****Just told the guy they need to do something about refills. He said there isn't a policy and would give me a free refill. Ah, more free butt time.

Howard