Monday, July 1, 2013

Arizona Update

Have been in Phoenix for 6 days and I'm doing the best I can. I'm on a mission to find the best area to move to. Phoenix is huge and the grid is laid out better than any city I've ever been to. Impossible to get lost here. Navigation has always been strong for me, but this is a well laid out city for any FTD'er. Between the layout and my GPS I haven't been confused driving at all. If I'm not sure where I am I just keep driving and run into a major artery. Simple is nice.

As far as finding a place. Well that's not been that easy. I started way up North in the Boonies where it would be cheaper and quiet. There I could do my FTD work unbothered and unimpeded.The apartment I found was great and cheap. 10 years ago before I got sick this was the type of area I dreamed of retiring to. Sedona. After 2 days I realized I was living a dream. This was out in the middle of nowhere and I would be totally isolated. I would never have human contact. There was a small mall 15 minutes away I visited with a TGIF and Red Robin. That sealed the deal. If I moved to the Boonies I would not only keep losing my mind to FTD, but would go insane.

Luckily I have had a friend from ALFA, Rita helping direct me to different areas. I have plenty of maps and real estate mags as well as online apartment hunting sites. Only problem is I can't organize or plan anything. Man, years ago I'd be on top of this. Every minute of the day and every place organized with appointments. Now I'm on a wing and a prayer. Ripping out pages, copying addresses. Forget it. Reminded me a couple of years ago when I had post it's all around my apartment littering everything. Never looked at them, but filled them out well. LOL. Then filled out yellow pads, then recorded. Recorded myself for hours and never listened to it. Bought a dry/erase board in October and filled it out. Might as well used permanent markers because it was never used once.

Back to the task at hand. So I began Wandering around checking out different areas. Would hit an apartment complex and go in. One after another. As I sit here now I'm totally exhausted. A combination of pushing the envelope and doing more than I should in Arizona heat. Since I arrive 6 days ago it's ranged from 110 to 119 degrees. I would take this heat over NY humidity any day, but it is hot. To hot for long walks or any walks in the summer. I also realize that I would definitely need a car here. I'm an excellent driver, but know I have FTD and would only drive to supermarkets, Starbucks etc. I'm looking for a simple life where I can be productive and do my FTD projects and enjoy my life. Haven't exactly figured out the car thing yet. No question, I need one here. If anyone out there has a decent car there looking to unload, I'll gladly take it off your hands. I need a little bit of a break. Scared of being apartment bound because of the excessive heat.

Phoenix will work out nicely. Closer to my kids. Assisted Living far superior than any I've seen or heard of, but hopefully I won't be checking into the Hotel California anytime soon. Quieter and slower than NYC. No more subways, elevators or crowded supermarkets.

I kept narrowing the search till I found an area in Scottsdale that was affordable and would allow me to sort of be a part of society. Plus there were Starbucks every mile. Of course I'm totally confused as to picking a place. Was hoping to put everything together with a Real Estate broker that specializes in apartments this morning. I've been in contact with him for over a month and was hoping with his expert tutelage, I'd be pointed in the right direction and go home to NYC with the deal sealed. Now I had scoped the area and new what I wanted. Just needed someone to help slam it home. Drove about a half hour to Glen's office this morning. Got there and his colleague told me he wasn't expected in this morning. Great. Told her I was in from NY and we had multiple contacts and a set appt. She called him and left a message. He called her back and gave her a message to tell me he was having car issues. Yea, yea, yea and the check is in the mail. With FTD I have absolutely no tolerance for bullshit. Simple decency of him calling me or having her handing me the phone and him saying sorry I screwed up would've sufficed. She asked if I wanted to reschedule. Pretty much told her to tell him he could go fuck himself. If I wanted to get jerked.......    well, you get the message.

Just focused on going back to the hotel. Once I arrived there my anger, frustration and exhaustion hit me. No running around for me. I'm fried and I know it. In fact, just left the hotel room about an hour ago (5pm) and am at a Starbucks close to where I'd like to live.

I haven't been able to do any of my usual groups, writing or advocacy since I left NY. I want to thank those of you writing to me with your concerns and compliments. Received this one this morning about someone that needs help and it picked me up and got me focused away from the asshole realtor. I'm changing the names.

Jane Doe Where's Howard Glick?? 
John Smith, I'm so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I won't pretend to know what you're going through. I only know FTD from the caregiver's point of view. I do remember though that I went through the disbelief as well. You wants to believe such a disease exists?? We tried to cherish every single day as best as we could. Howard's probably going to be your best resource. He, too, has FTD and is, in my opinion, a hero in the FTD world. 
Stay strong as best as you can, and when you can't, please swing by here and let us know so that we can be strong for you for a while.

I can only keep moving forward with a positive attitude and mindset to get this move done. Thank you all that have been helping me down this difficult road. Many keep throwing negatives at me about moving, Phoenix, driving, support etc. Please give it a fucking break. It's at the point where I need your support and help. If your not able to do this and can only be a purveyor of gloom and doom. Leave me alone. I have a life to build and many things I want to accomplish. 


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